Posted by: S. Elisabeth M. Abbott | December 3, 2015

Not My Story…

I’m not even sure what to title this…it’s not my story…but, I am affected by the whole situation. It involves betrayal, hurt, lies, deceit, and just flat out the lowest of the low people.

I’m against anyone being hurt. Whether it’s animals, friends, family, myself – but most of all, my daughter.  She’s a momma’s girl. Flat out. No apology given. She’s my world. I’m always on her side until she does wrong and then, yeah, she gets the full wrath…smile…

But, when she is hurt – the gloves come off.

I’ve said that it’s not my story…but…this part is mine. I’m reeling from the news to be honest. I don’t think I can even begin to describe the rage…the raw anger…the endless questions running thru my head – the biggest one, how did I not know??? As with everything, I believe a person has to go thru the steps. I will never forgive. I don’t want to. I want the guilty party to pay…if you know me, you know I believe in karma. Maybe I won’t be around when karma strikes, but, I know it will. And I hope it hurts. I hope this person loses everything. I don’t think anything is justice for this act, but, I’ll be willing to start with anything that makes this person suffer.

I will never trust someone again. I will never relax. I was working on opening up to someone new in my life, but brakes got pulled on that once I was told. I know, that’s not fair to the new person, but, hey, life isn’t fair. And in this case, fair doesn’t even apply.

I never understood parents who claimed they didn’t know what’s going on in their kids lives…until now. There were no signs – kids don’t turn purple when something isn’t right (I took that phrase from a friend…lol) but boy do I wish there was a signal when something isn’t right. I always figured I knew my daughter and I would know when something was wrong…but, sadly, I didn’t. Maybe I was caught up in my own issues…my own life…my own problems…my job…I don’t know…nothing can excuse the fact I didn’t know and I didn’t protect her.

Typing this is probably therapeutic for me. I don’t feel any better though. In fact, I am fresh with anger and frustration. I don’t think I am supposed to feel better though. It’s the kind of betrayal that goes beyond heart and soul. It hits in the stomach like a punch. It makes your skin crawl. It makes your back tingle with the horror that someone you know…used to love…could even commit such a heinous act.

Karma…one day…

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Responses

  1. Oh, great big hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My son was thirteen when I found out. It had happened when he was eight. I was clueless. And heartbroken.
    You are not alone.
    **hugs**

    Liked by 1 person


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